where is danny?


Danny! - Where Is Danny?

Title: Where Is Danny?
Release Date: November 23, 2009
Duration: 1 hour, 0 minutes
Label: Self-released
Album Type: Studio

1.  man, motherfuck an intro

2.  manic! at the disco

3.  where is danny?

4.  tattered fedora flow

5.  hoedown showdown

6.  i ain't the walrus

7.  turn me up

8.  many reasons

9.  still got love

10.  sloppy joe, pt. 1

11.  commercial break (interlude)

12.  fa fa fa

13.  this is your life (in west watch-a-ka-tella) (instrumental)

14.  off the hook

15.  george wendt

16.  nah, i don't like this beat yo

17.  theme music to a killing spree

18.  lost one

19.  scrambled eggs

20.  sloppy joe, pt. 2

21.  seven seconds of static (interlude)

22.  mama, i want to fucking sing

23.  wake the fuck up man (you're trippin' man)

24.  crank dat (hey dj)

25.  get down

26.  gone danny gone

No review available.


Man, motherfuck an intro

[Verse 1]
I sell heroin to Ellen DeGeneres's kids and breathe into 'em
Drivin' under the influence, hide weed in the transmission fluid
So when they pull over my shit I'm an innocent victim
If I try to buck, a cop'll cling to my tennis shoe
*beat boxes* My name is D. Swizzy
I keep busy, paraplegics with feet missing
Call me sensational (back is the incredible!)
But ten perecnt of my rhymes is illegible
It's Danny Swain on the internet
Posing in the nude in your sister's bed
What's he doing on the cover of Vanity Sausage
Granted, we saw such a thing coming for years
Damn it he lost but here's a way to spin it for PR's sake
Modify his EPK, say he's a J-E-R-K with no regard
Take a dated headshot
Photoshop some tattered tears
Now have him kissin' Baby, Cash Money out the stratosphere
Shit, it worked for Weezy
Believe me when I tell you D. Sweezy do it for TV
Slip a Prilozac to Kyla Pratt
Make Mya guzzle Dimetapp
While Danny waxes philosophical
You hear that? I'm still unstoppable

[Verse 2]
I've got that Boutros Boutros-Ghali Dalai Lama flow
Introduced Marsupilami's mommy to the dollar store
And spoiled the broad
*whistles* Spare the child, spoil the rod
They got it twisted
Optimisitic never 'cause my album sales are non-existent
I got a sickness and it's called I'ma-Fuck-You-Up-itis
Climb in the truck with Don Imus
And cruise the cul-de-sacs
DVD up in the dash, we watching "When Seagulls Attack"
I asked him where the hoes is at
He said "don't bring that bullshit back"
Goddammit Donnie, lighten up with your fat racist ass
More tasteless than Cissy Spacek wearing a Jason mask
Waitin' in my basement taped and gagged, in an apron
Gas oven at four hundred degrees, and someone lights a match
I'm 'bout to blow up
My competition is bogus
These wack rappers can go suck a dick
The kid is focused
Niggas fiend for my beats
I step on stages, girls scream like I'm Keith
Fanfare was bigger than Vivica Fox
Standing bare on the front of Vanity Fair
Stricken with chicken pox
You corny niggas can kick a rock, go rap with Sisqo
You talkin' greasy, you must've taken a bath in Crisco
D. Swain is back, manic at the disco, uh

[Verse 1]
Everybody wanna know where the fuck I been at
Been in fucking Pembroke, with a fucking skin rash
On edge sippin' from a keg of vinegar
Playin' Simon Says alone, collecting Pez dispensers
Stalking Megan Fox sending death threats
She sees my silhouette then I jet set
Selling breast sweat in water bottles, lost the lotto
Reading Robert Frost to this lip-glossed mullato
Hit Teresa up for booty flicks
Hacking phones, I'm the one that leaked Vanessa Hudgens nudie pics
Accident prone, spilled cologne on my laxatives
Signed to the Roc shortly after Mickey Factz did
Coke and Vicodin, smoke 'em right in your face
Boat rides in Kuwait, ghostwritin' for Drake
Been around the world eleven times
Built a cloning machine, created seven Kevin Federlines
Thumb twiddler? Never, sicker than ever
I had to disappear so I could get my shit together mannnnn

Somebody tell me where Danny! is
He's probably fighting a giant squid
Somebody tell me where Danny! was
I bet he's in Brooklyn selling drugs
Hey Danny!, where have you been at?

[Verse 2]
I been trying to collect this ransom for Scarlett Johannsen
Camping in Stedman's mansion, dancing with Ted Danson
Stealing beats then sell 'em to Charles Hamilton
Just to start scandals and shit, samples get flipped
Snortin' coffee beans in a green trough
Thinking obscene thoughts in Jimmy Iovine's loft
And I jotted 'em down, e-mailed the script to Kelsey Grammar
A sitcom about phone sex with Chelsea Handler?
It flopped, then I tried to bring the sock hop back
In purple knickerbockers shoppin' at the crock-pot shack, ya dig?
Raising seven illegitimate kids
With Ashley Olsen, hoping they all go into show biz
Plagiarizing screen plays for Jean Grae
Did a benefit concert with Green Day for free, hey
Thumb twiddler? Never, sicker than ever
I had to disappear so I could get my shit together mannnnn

Somebody tell me where Danny! is
He's probably doin' a ten year bid
Somebody tell me where Danny! was
I think he's dating Ashley Judd
Hey Danny!, where have you been at?

[Verse 1]
This is my tattered fedora flow
What's the matter? You mad at your horoscope?
Nigga switch your sign and quit your whinin'
Matter fact, switch your whole flagrant persona
Fubu is for boobs, switch to Dolce & Gabbana
Three cheers for perseverance
Plan B for my career?
Have a Verse-Of-The-year clearance
Tight shit, write shit well and get tracks bought
Strike rich, type hits, sell 'em to Black Thought
And make a killin', a million or more
Stealing your ceilings and floors
Chillin' with Amil and Sommore, uh
They like to roleplay and dress as nude cops
Gotta go, Coolio, mean it's gettin' +Too Hot+
If Faye had twins, she'd probably have two 'Pac's
I gay-bash men who like to grab dude's cocks
Nah, I'm only kidding, just me ol' me
An Equal Opportunity Bigot: E.O.B.

[Verse 2]
Peace to Section 8, keep the riff-raff pissed
Peace to Megan Bates with them big ass tits
That keep me warm at night, you're more than tight
You're the amplifier jack in my cordless mic, I'm crass
Splish splash, I was taking a bath
Made it a habit to snap emcees
And break 'em in half
Don't know what happened to the patience I had
You just a faker and a snake in the grass
Real talk homie
If I'm a liar than Pinocchio isn't
You mad this album's full of fire and colloquialisms
Rented out the chapel for my bachelor party
And sent the choir to a Tokyo prison
I'm so cruel

[Verse 1: Von Pea]
He ain't 'Ye and we ain't De La
We ain't paid but we ain't strayed, why?
It is temptin' to go in for a victim
To pimp him, simpin' with video vixens
The fans tell me that I ain't allowed to quit
And I'd be proud to sift through the e-mails
Like I am about to get through to teen males
And tell 'em it's alright to respect a female
These other rhymers write like part-timers
It's a harsh climate thus I'm off grindin'
Often reminded we awesome and timeless
From Austin to Thailand, we tied in
I can rhyme plus I can mind
My own damn business, some of y'all should try
The flow's mad senseless, none of y'all can ride
The beat like I
Or Danny, 'bye

[Verse 2: Danny!]
Hi! It's D. and The Beatmaker
Please take a seat in the rear
Make way for the best
Fifteen men on a dead man's chest
Spent sixteen yen on a Stedman dress
Yes, the king of non-sequiturs is back
Back with a brand new track
Watch the online editors attack
Underpaid snakes
Fake as a steak on a Rubbermaid plate
Have you seen my reviews?
Jesus, these G's is confused
Wouldn't know a good record if it bit 'em in their asparagus
Had a therapist once
Cut her off when she called the kid an arrogant cunt
That's the third time this happened this week
Flipped her the bird, choked the cat in the sleep
And beat the pussy up
Double entendre
Trouble man cuddled with a couple blond Sandras
And Sonya from the Bronx with the ganja
Keeps prank-calling my phone, I don't answer
As-Salamu alaykum
Robbed the kid's hospital, lots of tonsils taken
Hey now, you wanna see?
Got it for the low-low, PayPal the funds to me
Black market pimpin'
Catch me in the booth in the back of Martha's Vineyard
If I ain't there tell 'em Arthur sent ya
Got a good discount on them hearts and dentures, yep
Street peddler for real
Synagogue boss hog with secular appeal, oh

Nothing left to prove
So I'ma hit you with something that's extra smooth
And I'm a give you a muffin with extra blueberries
Necessary, but you can pick 'em off
That euphemism is lost
Never take what I say at face value
Marinate, what I say it may wow you
Levitate, don't let negative space surround you
Feeling good, feeling great, how are you?
Feeling good, feeling great, how are you?
Still in the hood, building 8, tower 2
Pilates with my gal pal
Spending royalty checks I got from Bow Wow
Ghost writer du jour, on a world tour with Zsa Zsa Gabor
I think I'll prank call Akon and Lady Gaga some more
Nah nah, you borin' 'em
Catch me in Manhattan at the Prada Emporium
My chick got a sick shoe game
But her hips too thick for the hoop chain, mayne
I put her on that Jenny Craig diet
Hire a private eye from Winnipeg
I catch her slippin' then her food's mine
Instead of steak feed her lines like Gertrude Stein
And she'll be back to normal in no time

[Verse 1]
Uh, yo turn me up
Uh, yo turn me up
Uh, yo turn me up
Uh, yeah

[Verse 2]
Uh, yo turn me up
Yeah, yo turn me up
Yeah, yo turn me up
Yeah, like

[Verse 3]
Now turn me up
Turn me up
Little more, little more, yeah
Now turn me up
Turn me up, yeah

[Verse 4]
Uh, turn me up
Turn me up!
Turn me up
Yo yo, yo turn me up
Now turn me up
That's right, mow turn me up

[Verse 1]
Me and C. Brown prowl Belize
Lookin' for three brown breezies in the crowd
Eating gouda cheese
One of the gals gave the kid mad cow disease
Now my knees powerless, my fever's a thousand degrees
We're not allowed to sneeze, it arouses bees
So let's smoke a pound of trees cause the weed
Has been clinically proven to drown a disease
Yo it was me, Chris Brown, Lisa Raye, and my pal Louise
Getting blowed in the Panama Canal, please
Keep it down or police will surround these
And take the keys to the 'pala and impound
Howard's Eddie Bauer power skis and my flower beads
Now to appease one of these three teases
That I found at the start of this verse
Powder these nuts
And since I'm well-endowed
Squeezed on the whole ham
This is what she told Dan, brougham

I love you
For so many reasons
Which means
Love you with the freshness of a
Love you with the freshness of a

[Verse 2]
I wasn't raised wrong, I got off the path
Terrorizing my class in a Mothra mask
At 17 I was pissin' off my dad
And stuck a gay porn mag in his Kaufmann bag
My mama found it and she tossed his ass
Out of the house, threw spaghetti sauce across his back
And attacked him with a moss-colored faucet rack
He started coughin', gagged and he lost his grasp
On my mom's apron, she starts spacin'
She gave him more kicks than those found in Lebron's basement
More fist-to-nose than Henry Clark gave Sonny Liston
With blows, she laid him on pavement
Mama maimed him, tamed him, proclaimed him dead
'Til I ran up and admitted that I framed him
They both laughed and they said "Oh Danny!
You and your pranks, that's why you're our favorite in the family"

[Verse 1]
It was all a dream, I used to refurbish gasoline
And sell it for the low, secondhand fuel
Biggie in the headphones, Method Man's cool
Back of the class, ass playin' Tetris in school
But I came a long way pursuin' my dreams
To televisions 52-inch screens
Now it got me wishing I could give the fame back to the game
No matter how many groupies it brings
'Cause you were my nubian queen
Among other dubious things
I used to call you, I'd call you on every weekend
When it comes to my career, you helped quite a bit
And when I felt like shit, you would be right there
My girlfriend, and no one in the world could replace you
I remember when you helped me write the hook for "Strange Fruit"
It was our dream, not mine
You used to tell me that you'd say a little prayer
'Til the day that I got signed
I never thought that we would separate
But I guess you lost your patience
Wastin' time on me and my occupation
I kept you waitin' I was focused on my goal
While you was focused on your role as the significant other
But if it was love, I never should've put you on the backburner
Learned my lesson, wishin' you could see me now
G's, TV's and three CD's, wow
I hope you still got love for me

[Verse 2]
I wish that I could tell you every word that I could
And yes, my third album's still certified wood
But at least it got my name to buzzin'
Copped a little fame, it's nothin'
Cousins comin' out the woodworks like I'm Dame or somethin'
I +Dash+ed to glory, and that's the story
I even tried to reconcile, of course you had to ignore me
But you see I'm livin' clean now
LRG jeans now
Plus your stepmother said she'd seen you in town, now
I tried to link up, and you said Tuesday
So I went around the hood like a bootleg Lupe
Stopped and asked
How to get to Dobson Ave.
And ran into a friend that saw you last
I asked him when's the last he heard from?
He said you had two kids and
Now you're on your third one
I still got love for you girl

D. Swain strike a nerve in bitches that read Zane
And swallow hominy grits, I'm back on my misogyny tip
(You got your heart broke?) Probably bitch
(Well man up with your goddamn McGruff-lookin' ass)
Yo, met this chick Amanda in cooking class
Took a last minute slot for the low-low
Put some sassafras in the pot with the pollo
Impressed the ho, yo
Teacher say "now you're cookin' with gas"
Introduced myself I said "it's nice to meet ya
I like the meat you mixed with basil leaves and sliced paprika
But why'd you jump on table 3 and bite the teacher?"
She punched me in my foodbox, made off with my two socks
Damn girl you know I likes it rough
Other guys might give up
But I am in it to win it
In it for spinach
I'm so discreet, whispered to her
"Can I poke the ovaries with the kosher beef?
We can smoke a stogie afterwards and go to sleep"
Feelin' fly in my endeavors, she said "why I never!
How dare you disrespect me boy you got me mixed up"
Twenty minutes later I was diggin' out the thick slut
Of course my aims is to one-night-stand it
She telling me commitment is something she can manage
Goddamnit, too arrogant to tell her what my plan is
She fell asleep, I vanished
Went home and made a Manwich
I'm gone

Cravin' to bone laid up with Raven-Symone naked
Made a clone paid him to spray the cologne fragrance
He never came through, useless help
If you want something done you gotta do it yourself
Open up, open up and let the funk flow in
Smoke enough coconut to make you punch Joe Flynn
From "McHale's Navy"
Does he ring any bells? Maybe
Been dead for thirty years I bet he smells crazy
Too bad I pissed away the money Dave Chappelle paid me
My doctor bills are through the roof I'm gettin' pale daily
I pop some pills to end it all like 10 or 12 baby
E-mailed my lady let her know I got to hell safely
Wait, I think there's been a mistake
Somebody must have went and spiked the kid's Dominican cake
So box up all of my cinnamon and send it to Kate
You got a problem you can vent at my wake
They say the good die young
I guess these grimey niggas live a long time
But me and grimey niggas get along fine
Man we all tryin' to come up, sundown to sunup
Run 'round the dump trucks and gun down you dumb fucks
Ugh, gee that hook was horrid
I think I'll see if Mama Bear can re-cook the porridge
She'd rather meet me at the Casbah for tapas
So I can help her understand the "Fa Fa" synopsis

[Verse 1: Danny!]
When I got the phone call from my girl BOSCO
Askin' do I wanna go and grab some tacos
Yo I'm in the middle of Street Fighter 10
I ain't tryin' to hit up All You Can Eat night again
But BOSCO's like "ho, put down the console
If you go to bed starvin' don't hold me responsible"
She was right son, the kid was hungry
So I stopped M. Bison from kicking Chun-Li
And I pressed pause, put on my fresh drawers quickly
Yes y'all even shaved my chest all spiffy
Then Nikki Jean hit me, said she was in town for the week
And do I wanna come and join her in the sheets?
Sweet, hit up her suite an hour later
Frontwards backwards I'm a power player
Didn't want BOSCO to be mad I didn't meet her
So before I left home left the phone off the receiver, ugh

Maybe he's sleeping, maybe he's ill
(That's what I want her to think, I'm such a stinker)
Phone disconnected, unpaid bill it's off the hook
It's off the hook
It's off the hook
It's off the hook
It's off the hook

[Verse 2: Danny!]
$89.99 a month? That is comical
No frills, whole phone bill's astronomical
My chips so tight
That's why I keep my talk time shorter
Than the hair on a San Francisco dyke

[Verse 3: Che Grand]
Sidekick vibratin' off the disco lights
The caller ID's readin' "fuck my life"
Can't push ignore, this cat's ringtone's "SpottieOttie"
But I ain't pickin' up unless this shit about some money
Preferably the type that I don't have yet
And you dudes need Crackberry etiquette, it's evident
But let me keep it relevant, the data plan killing me
Move every three weeks so I don't see what they billing me
The fuckery, texting me to RSVP
To a show I'm not on, douchebag get gone
Your buzz won't last long, I push the power button
Callin' from an unknown like a nigga slow or somethin'
No, I'm thinking I may go to Morocco
Leave my cell phone an arm away, message sayin' "swallow"
+Don't Disturb This Groove+ but fuck +The System+
Besides that they got GPS's in em


I'm like a G in a peacoat
Kumquat, cum yacht, skeet skeet in a boat
Fuck you think I'm knee deep in it for?
For cheese? Nigga please
Feed me free reefer and coke
Pop some Midol and I'm all set
Run down to Midtown, get my balls wet
But not that tranny action
I'm talking Moms Mabley baby, Granny Jackson
Designed this flyer in Papyrus font
Sent an e-mail just to see what Miley Cyrus want
She told me Comic Sans, I'm not a damn mind reader
Besides, these Y's look like I's on the wifebeater
You don't like us? Well keep your distance from us
Give us ten feet, mincemeat
Pita chips and hummus
My mantra is "Get Rich or Die Tryin'"
Or try dying, or try iron-on tie-dying
Or try Breyers® brand yogurt
Beware of Leviathans, they try to scam ogres
Ask Shrek, he can vouch
Peace to Salma Hayek's ass, chest, cheeks and mouth
Damnit I have needs
I ain't an ass man, show me calves and knees
I'm smellin' mustard gas in the breeze
Stuck the brass centipede in the aspirin machine, doggy
Now everybody do the George Wendt
Camping outside with Mormons in an orange tent
Watching the foreign kids perform "Rent"
On a worn fence
For 44 cents

Yeah, yeah
It's the return of the
Mister Mister Mister
1, 2, it's D. Swain
I put my
I get, yo
Nah, you know --
I don't, nah
I don't like this beat yo

[Verse 1: Danny!]
I'm a narcissist with moxie
A Marxist by proxy
My life is a motherfuckin' farce, just watch me
My wife is a motherfuckin' heartless Nazi
We get along though, she's a ping-pong pro
Money out the wazoo she got King Kong dough (so?)
That's the reason why I stick with her (oh)
Grab the keys and drive to Pittsbizzurgh (fa sho!)
Stack the cheese and buy a pit litter
A sick spitter yo, I saw the big picture though
Flew up to Chi-town and caught a Kid Sister show
Toes done up with her fingernails matchin'
But the ho's fucked up, sound like Tinkerbell rappin'
Heard she was ready for some single male action
So I made myself drink a pail of Captain Morgan
One drum of rum'll have me rappin' foreign
Like "humdumalemalemezacdezachdejournen"
Me and Danny Brown
Rockin' matchin' hand-me-down letterman sweaters
Damn we some panty hounds
Scoopin' chicks from the greasy spoon
Been a freak ever since I stuck my feet out of Niecey's womb

[Verse 2: Danny Brown]
The kush got purple hair like a hoodrat
While you still beg to smoke
Askin' where the goods at

Look at all of these rappers that's unemployed
Your boy is a coked-out version of Pastor Troy

[Danny Brown]
This the real McCoy
You rappers is decoys
At the end of all the games
You a bitch like Metroid
Call 'em Samus

But don't forget the hammers

[Danny Brown]
We smut the prom queen
And jumped the big man on campus

And us against them
Damn bruh, it can't be tamed
Call the goons
Have your granny drowned in candy rain

[Danny Brown]
Danny Brown and Danny Swain
Don't confuse the name
Got fire in our brain like Ichabod Crane

Like Ichabod Crane?

[Danny Brown]
I think they insane

Shinin' like the sun

[Danny Brown]
But ain't no diamonds in my chain
Nigga you dead wrong

Nigga we headstrong

[Danny Brown]
Nice as Eminem rhyme "acorn"
With "Foghorn Leghorn"

Dreams of sexing Ellen Cleghorne
Knocking up the broke bitches
They all having my kids

[Danny Brown]
I'll show you what it is
And what it all could be
Couldn't write it in your afterlife

Damn bruh, is that your wife?

[Verse 1]
I heard motherfuckers saying they'd ruin Swain
But who's playing who when sabotage doesn't do a thing
Make the color change in their mood rings
Made me question who was really crazy and who's sane
Would've stayed with 'em but there wasn't much to gain
I put friends over business, niggas was too vain
But when friends start to think with a new brain
They're kinda like food stains
And you gotta get rid of the stupid lames
Don't get it twisted not a day passes by
That I don't have a single tear fall past my eye
It was like three brothers and a sister that I never
Had, always Big'd each other Up, ties got severed
Mad, but I guess good friends come a dime a dozen
The funny thing is I still love 'em but fuck 'em
Damnit dude
Did we really end this over white pants and pointed shoes?
Who's disappointing who?
Guess what you said was true, really wasn't room for two
Superstars so you did what you had to do
Brainwashed the crew, we still don't speak
One thought for himself but the others is weak
They lost one

You might win some
But you really lost one
You just lost one
It's so silly, how come?
When it's all done
Did you really gain from
What you done done?
It's so silly, how come?
You just lost one

[Verse 2]
I don't think it's meant to be, T
But she loves her husband more than she does me
And honestly, at 33?
I would prob'ly love my family more than I did she
So we don't speak, just keep excerpts
From our relationship at arm's reach, it hurts
To pretend it never occurred but I half-forgive her
Even though she kicked me to the curb
Coped with it the best way I knew
Made a song and killed you off, named that shit "Where Were You"
Remember when you called me and you said it embarrassed you
Made me shake my head at how I had an affair with you
'Cause of you I couldn't let a chick get too close
Soon as feelings started to progress I'm like "adios"
I swear, you really brought a good man down
I didn't think I'd ever pick the pieces and rebound
But, Danny's driving 6's now
I got riches now
Paid back student loans for both of my sisters now
I'm doin' real good, I don't miss you now
See how life twists around, fucker?
You lost one


[Verse 3]
My father died in his house last June
So under the belief he left way too soon
Close my eyes and squeeze, try to block that tune
How much of my conscious can this shit consume?
I mean, when he cheated on my mama I wanted to kill him
And when he beat me he was treated like one of the villains
But even felons get a second chance
But with pride sentiments don't get a second glance
I was fresh off the plane from the Grammys two years ago
My folks had been divorced for some time, just so you know
I got a phone call from this nigga like "here we go"
Let it go to voicemail cause I don't talk to hoes
And that began a pattern of extending himself
But all I could remember is him grippin' his belt
And smackin' me in the face so his hand I smacked away
"That's what you get for breakin' my mama's heart," I'd say
So the messages piled up
Askin' me if maybe I would like to reconcile
What? What is you, crazy?
Played 'em back for my friends, we all clowned him
Little did I know that my own father was drownin'
I got a call and my pops sounded real sick
But I was still stiff and wasn't feelin' it
As I continued to perfect my raps
A month later, I found out that his kidneys collapsed
Obituary said he died alone
If I had tried to make amends he might have known
I had grown, my atonement is too little too late
Father forgive me for not starting a new slate
Great, I lost one


[Verse 1]
Man, fuck rappin' 'bout a broad
Rappin' 'bout a necklace
Rappin' 'bout some sex
Man I'm rappin' 'bout my breakfast
So pass the coffee
If Asher Roth did this
You would probably give his ass a pass
Get off me
Mix my flappy jacks with some sassafras and toffee
Grab a tab of frothy
Cheese for my broth, B
Raisin oatmeal with the soy milk? Nah-uh
I'd rather have the french toast, you want some?
Don't come near my plate unless you want a severed hand
And when it comes to cereal
Don't pick whatever brand, never man
Them Apple Dapples is forever bland
And the fake Alpha Bits got funny letters, damn
You seen my cousin?
This nigga makes the meanest English muffins
Hit up the Krispy Kreme
Bring a dozen of them
Cinnamon rolls, save one for dinner
But for now, sausage and toast is for beginners
You wanna get with D. Swain
Then don't be rude with them Toaster Strudels
If you're frugal with the food, nigga screw ya

[Chorus 1.5x]
Muffins with the blueberry spread
Cheese grits and scrambled eggs
Did ya hear what I said?
Save me some scrambled eggs

[Verse 2]
One of the few fuckin' songs
On this album with a hook
A breakfast connoisseur
Mybe I should write a book
I'll give you hell if you ain't sellin' Belgian waffles
The fuck is turkey bacon?
Man I swear that smell is awful
I like my hash browns scattered and smothered
Battered and covered
With diced ham and splattered with mustard
I'm all about the fried potatoes
And sliced tomatoes
And beans and rice
But I don't even like to try the bagels
This sunny side egg is lookin' like a cyclops
D. Swain signin' off, I'll meet y'all at the IHOP

Streets robbed me I wasn't educated properly
But fuck that I needed money for a Harley
Multi-colored streamers handlebars looking gnarly
Parked outside the bar, security didn't card me
One of the perks of having a big penis
My blood Suga Lo, like stabbing the kid's fingers
And Danger Mouse was at the spot looking dapper
Flagged the bartender and ordered a red snapper
So it was me and Gnarls Barkley at the Mardi Gras
Posted up at this rinky dink bougie artsy bar
I overheard these two drunken fools losin' it
Couldn't make it out, my assumption's YouTube and shit
Or MySpace plays, some artist that they came across
Poppin' shit about him talking like he lame or soft
Like "blahzay blah", "where the fuck they find him?"
Turned around when I heard Def Jux shouldn't have signed him
Nigga what? Cracked a bottle in a fit of rage
Disengaged, stabbed the second goofy in his ribcage
The first clown I gave him a Mike Tyson
Straight up and knife-sliced him and gave him a nice bitin'
Then I grabbed their heads, banged 'em on the wall yo
Repeatedly, frequently, brains was on the floor
Man D. Swain does it all
Took my size 17's and put the pain to they jaw
One stomp for the blogs that overlook me
Two stomps for the promoters that never book me
Three stomps for you fickle-ass fucks
That say my shit is weak and think that Nickelback sucks
Blood was everywhere, I was feeling good
Even did my Eddie Haskell dance
Suga Lo was like "I ain't know you was a Dizzee Rascal fan"
Well goddamn, ain't this a B
Thought them boys was dissin' me
Seven hours later called up Tiffany from the precinct
Loyal to a T but her feet stink
Bailed me out of jail even though her man was hatin' on me
Took me to the crib, shorty had a Manwich waitin' on me


[Verse 1]
I was born, the son of a knife and a time bomb
With a cordless mic in my right palm
When my mama seen it her reaction was quite calm, at first
Until I looked up at her and uttered a curse
Jesus she freaked out, screaming and pleading to get a nurse
The orderlies aborted me, figures it didn't work
So I'm born with these deformities, itchin' to spit a verse
Mama brought me home from the hospital inside her purse
A newborn with torn ligaments
Crawling 'round the house in shoehorns
And foreign cigarettes
I kept my two fronts gold
While writin' lyrics
Made a song at just a few months old, oh
My mom would never opt to play with me
Spent the first three years looking for adoption agencies

I've been writing my songs
And tryin' to be strong
But mama I just want to sing
I know you don't like rap
But you must face facts
And let a nigga do his thing
So mama please
Don't disown your own son
Don't disown your own son
Mama I want to sing

[Verse 2]
I was 8, man
Feeling great, rockin' an apron
My motto was "rip spirits when I kick lyrics"
But my mama wasn't tryin' to hear it
Tried to leave me at Sears with
Some Jell-O and a stolen gear shift
I had to pawn it for cab fare
Made it to the crib, gave my mama a bad scare
I told my mama "this is what I really wanna do
Be a famous rapper, do a tell-it-all on Donahue"
But then she winced
"You little son of a bitch
No son of mine is gonna be a hippity hop hop
Rappity rap rapper, that could be bad
Back to the bathroom you go
Strapped to the crapper without your crackers"
But mom, how long you gonna lock me in the restroom?
"Until you're 22, when this little phase possessing you
Has run its course, don't you wanna be a doctor, Danny?
I talked to Watson's family, he's in college already
And he's only 11, you'll never make it to heaven rappin'"
Her telling me I couldn't was the best that ever happened


[Verse 1]
Poppin' Percocets
At the circus with Kirk Cameron
Standing in satin Hammer pants
Nervous and stammerin'
Burstin' cannons at cannibals
Slurpin' cans of Squirt with mannequins
Danimals licking yogurt from their mandibles
Famished, naked nurses
With cans as big as the Earth is
Handing me burgers and sandwiches?
Candice Bergen

[Verse 2]
My necklace was so deceptive
Told me that my check
Was supposed to be here before breakfast
I'm no detective
Poked my nose in a septic tank
While I'm robbin' a bank
On the coast of Texas
Posted Beck's bail
Drove off in a stolen Lexus
The +Modern Guilt+ had made us go and wreck it
Seth Rogen

[Verse 1: Ladi Jade]
Grippin' grain, sippin' drank
Subaru drippin' paint
When I pull up in my car
That D. Swain be going hard
No regard
I don't give a fuck when I be passin' through
Best believe I be bumpin' "Cafe Surreal, Pt. 2"
Danny! Swain: best producer/rapper in the industry
If you don't agree then
You cannot be friends with me
I don't need no change of pace
Everyday I play his tapes
Haters get mad
When I rock my D. Swain Bathing Apes

[Chorus: Danny!]
DJ please hey
Turn that fucking Danny! up
Turn that Danny! up
T-turn that fucking Danny! up

[Verse 2: Ladi Jade]
Anybody not feeling Danny! needs a telegram
Signed by the Jade one, also known as Yes Ma'am
Danny Is Dead? No you're insane, Danny!
'Cause I can't even get your songs up out my brain, Danny!
Danny! speaks so jammy
I see Danny! at the Grammys
Taking over the planet
Oh how the nerve of Danny!
I am the frenzy but Danny! be the Frisbee
He fly like a flying saucer
I'm just the oracle
So you can row your boat gently down the stream
While me and Danny! come through and tsunami your dreams
Formulated a blood bath, D. Swain says he's the maniac
Submitted permission to kill
Any chickens I meet that like to swaggerjack
You kleptomaniacs are lacking sauce, now pardon that
Get my boy Danny! on the track
He'll eat you like a snack


[Verse 3: Ladi Jade]
Charm it was a classic
Damn I gots to have it
iTunes got that two-for-one
Ladi Jade's a bastard
Every lyric I can spit it
Every album song for song
Man the way he run the game
You can call him Donkey Kong
You can say I am a Danny! chick
Called myself excited when I seen him on the Grammy list
Even got my family pissed my mom would say I'm sprung
Cause I got D. Swain's initials tat-tatted on my tongue
Tatted on my tongue, tat-tatted on my tongue
Even got a Danny! bobblehead
Squeeze it it plays "Not the One"
Clever as he wanna be, plus he's dapper man
How else can I say it?
Motherfuck these other rappers man


[Verse 1]
D. Swain in the place to be, see
And I got what it takes to rock the mic right
And I got funnel cakes I copped from ShopRite
But I'm not gonna make you cop tonight, aiight
It's the return of rap's Mr. Burns
Coming back with a track for black kids to learn
And white kids to recite
Dykes will get excited
Bi chicks'll probably try to memorize it
I could glamorize this life, I'd rather not
I'm not just a melanin-blessed Asher Roth
I scoff at the haters, mock the nay sayers
But never hawk my wares up on Okayplayer
The kid's got the juice and the OJ flavor
O.J. for mayor 'cause I'm killing this rap shit
White Bronco flow, the glove and the mask fit
Somebody call the law
Before Danny go batshit on accident

[Chorus - 2X]
Na na na
Get on down
Get on down
Na na na, na na na na

[Verse 2]
Meth fiend, breath clean
Fresher than Seth Green
Geoff Beene attire
Fly as MacBeth's queen
Ugh, when D. Swain get on the mic
He bring the game to life
Making beautiful noise
Creating the soundtrack
Just for you and your boys, uh
D. Swizzy knows how to get busy
So don't be actin' stuck up and nitpicky
You don't wanna dance
Shut the fuck up and sit pretty
If rap's dead then I'm the resurrector
Catch me, Studio B, the seventh sector
Out to get the cookies and ransack Nabisco
+Ramen+ gets me goin', +Panic! at the Disco+
I get applause without the metaphors
That these other cats use as a crutch
I'm very bored, good Lord
I know it really hurts my dear
So I'ma end this verse right here
Now where's the chorus?


There he goes
Smackin' craniums with Swain's relentless flow
Rips it though
Jack Delaney rum is what he's sippin' yo
He can make them act so loco
He's wonderin' if he should skip this show
Fuck no, smoke these blokes
Competition run 'em over, oh no
He ain't had a real buzz like this
Ever since Charm dropped 2006
Now the fiends need a fix
But he's pissed
'Cause his name never gets mentioned in the mix
Back out of the game he must go
Rap will never be the same as before
Baskin' in the fame
As he's overreacting
To the lames and these hoes
Sixth album, how was the outcome?
Overlooked five years in a row
But it's getting to the point
That my joints are a white shoelace
Disappearin' in the snow
Gonna have to get mentioned
Some incentives, make it worth my while
Sick of being underrated when I see
All these shark-ass niggas tryin' to bite my style
Catalogue twelve records deep
That'll hold down all my peeps
Niggas sleep so I can't keep putting out these LPs
Studio time ain't cheap
And to my fans
I hope that y'all understand
The difference between quittin'
And takin' a stand
I'm finished man

Goodbye, so long, peace
Goodbye, so long, peace